Dear Mr Levy: Pulitzer Pie

Wednesday 14 January 2009

Pulitzer Pie

Sunday

Redknapp is losing patience with left-back Gareth Bale and wants to sell him or use him as part of a deal to land Middlesbrough midfielder Stewart Downing. (Daily Mirror)

Today

Redknapp is losing patience with left-back Gareth Bale and wants to sell him or use him as part of a deal to land Middlesbrough midfielder Stewart Downing. (Daily Mirror)

Quality journalism.

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burn your season ticket

As a loyal supporter of Tottenham Hotspur FC I am in constant war against Daniel Levy and his propaganda machine, which continues to fool the Spurs faithful, season after season. An accountant shouldn't be running a football club.

Are we in an abundance of debt? No. Do we always have money to spend? Yes. But yet here we are trapped in the depths of an eternal struggle. Never sustaining the grandeur of glory we so richly deserve.

I'm also the founder of the The Association of Real Spurs Enforcers Neutralising Antichrist Levy and the League of Lilywhites. My crusade is one of immense importance and grandeur:

To free the spirit of Tottenham Hotspur from his evil grasp and allow us to progress forward rather than being ripped to shreds like a cockerel with no means of escape surrounded by rabid foxes (Levy, and his board of directors are the foxes in this metaphor. I'm the cock).

At the end of each season, I burn my season ticket in full view of the directors box, from my seat in the Park Lane Lower as a protest of disgust at his reign of injustice and humiliation.

Levy cares for nothing other than feeding his ego, spending money on superfluous players and knee-jerking faster than a West Stand season ticket-holder. My eyes see no glory. Just overly expensive bagels and dead pixels in the Jumbotron and DVD releases of score-draws.

WANTED

I'm looking for a publisher. My aim is to complete a diary of the 2008 and 2009 seasons. Considering some of the (bland) Tottenham related football 'diaries' that manage to get published, I'd really appreciate if someone out there had the balls to go with something more leftfield.

If I make a ton of money, I will be one step closer to forming a consortium to take over the club and rid N17 of Daniel Levy and his minions.

For more information on the future take-over, please stay tuned to this blog.

The 'Consortium of United N17 Tottenham Supporters' is the way forward.

What they say...

"I find your blog to be a pathetic joke. How can you claim Levy isn't doing a good job? You're a disgrace to Spurs fans"
-Paxton87

"It's a load of gonads. This geezer (spooky) spends his time complaining about people slagging the club off and does it himself in every paragraph he writes. This is the type of supporter whom I hate listening to. They will never be happy, no matter what. If we win the Premiership title he'll complain that we've lost our identity"
-rdless

"This very long winded stram of consciousness offers no insight other than the boardroom is shit, Redknapp is shit and our team is a pushover - there you go mate, done in one sentence. I read the whole thing because I was waiting for some interesting insight, it never came. poor"
-A journalist who reads The Times

"Let's be 'aving you son! Let's burn that Levy effigy together. And maybe go for drinks or catch a movie?"
-Kate, North London

"You're not a soldier. You're a studenty socialist playboy wanker"
-Anonymous

"Forget Levy. Get Ramos out. Get Jol back. At least he could speak English, even if he did start every sentence with 'no'? I can imagine the half time team talks. 'Hey boss, we gonna win?' 'No..' No wonder he lost his job"
-Disgruntled, UK

"Graham Roberts would run through walls for Tottenham. Jenas would apologetically whisper that he has lost the keys for the door, then sleep on a park bench for the night. "
-Big Dave

"He's actually called spooky on another website.... he's the author of all the bullshit above which you mention . he's as much of a wanker as i keep telling everbody that you are.... ohh and someone else who's on that website & on this (not me) has told him so..."
-traciebigtits

"Poor management of the club by Levy. I'm in full support of your work Spooky. Though disappointing you haven't put together a consortium to buy the club. I can see it now - season tickets for £300 and no West Stand. Bliss!"
-Ted the Baker

"Burning a season ticket is so 2004. You need to do a Banksy. Paint the South Stand red in protest."
-Derek of the East Stand

"Me, me, me, me, me...Turgid"
-southstand1882

"I totally agree that ENIC & Levy only really care about lining their pockets at the expense of our beloved club. When they stop running THFC like a corner shop we might actually get back to playing a decent game for decent people. I am not rich but I am willing to invest and support in any consortium that has a realistic chance of displacing the greed and evil that is suffocating the Glorious Spurs"
-TrueSpur

"The geezer is clearly a whacko. Anyone who has been writing to someone for several years and actually believes that Daniel Levy has created a thread to catch him out, suffers from dillusions of grandeur and is probably a stalker.
Bald Archie, if the site is not dedicated to the hating of one man, then WHY IS THE SITE CALLED "DEAR MR LEVY"???"
-rdless

"Isn't it all getting a little old now - you are like a monument to yourself"
-Wazza

You know.....

......we always called each other Yids. Like you said to, uh, somebody: You're gonna like this guy. He's all right. He's a Yiddo. He's one of us: You understand?

We were Tottenham fans.

Lilywhites. But Jimmy and I could never sit in the West Stand because we we didn't drive Mercs. It didn't even matter if you didn't own an Opus. To become a member of the Park Lane crew you've got to be one hundred per cent Spurs so they can trace all your relatives back to the old days in the 1960's.

See, it's the highest honour they can give you. It means you belong to a family and crew. It means that nobody can fuck around with you. It also means you could fuck around with anybody just as long as the old bill and stewards wasn't watching. It's like a license to sing.

It's a license to do anything. As far as Jimmy was concerned with Tommy being ITK, it was like we were all ITK. We would now have one of our own up a tree at the Lodge

~ Yidfellows, 1882 -

Wednesday 14 January 2009

Pulitzer Pie

No comments:

Thought of the Week

burn your season ticket

rumourwhores.com

About the letters

Collection of Letters

Deconstructing the Tottenham Midfield Conundrum

Other Stuff

Harvey Dent v Two-Face

The League of Lilywhites est 2007

Blog Archive

studs-up.com

glory glory.co.uk

Bedtime Reading

WANTED

Fight the Power

Levy out?

Spurs ground re-development

Football Forums and Sites

Tottenham Blogs

more football

the enemy

random

Petitions

Field Reports via Twitter

Twitter Updates

feed me

email subscriptions

Viva La Revolution !

What they say...

Now available on Blue-Ray

You know.....

Never Forget

blog labels

Wednesday 14 January 2009

Pulitzer Pie

No comments:

Thought of the Week

burn your season ticket

rumourwhores.com

About the letters

Collection of Letters

Deconstructing the Tottenham Midfield Conundrum

Other Stuff

Harvey Dent v Two-Face

The League of Lilywhites est 2007

Blog Archive

studs-up.com

glory glory.co.uk

Bedtime Reading

WANTED

Fight the Power

Levy out?

Spurs ground re-development

Football Forums and Sites

Tottenham Blogs

more football

the enemy

random

Petitions

Field Reports via Twitter

Twitter Updates

Subscribe To DML

feed me

email subscriptions

Viva La Revolution !

What they say...

Now available on Blue-Ray

You know.....

Never Forget

blog labels