Kenwyne Jones: Is he a Cole or a Drogba?

Palacios has completed his medical, all down to personal terms being agreed now. Would be nice that some day Spurs will have a scouting network that allows them to pick up these players BEFORE they become flavour of the month with other clubs who got there first. An obvious change in mentality is needed. Just because we are a rich club that can attract players to London life doesn’t mean we need to be lazy with our approach and wait for other clubs to pluck players from obscurity, and then wait for us to come in with an over-inflated bid. Well done to Wigan for purchasing a reserve player for less than a million and selling him for fourteen. Now that's sell-on value that Levy would appreciate.

Still no confirmation on Appiah, but the forum and message board 'In The Know' peeps are suggesting it's still going to happen. We shall see.

We have also apparently signed Chelsea keeper Cudicini for a million. Great if he is at the club to give Gomes competition and play as number 2. Not so great if ‘arry has decided to sell Gomes. My money is on Carlo being a replacement for Sanchez. If this is confirmed later on, then good work on getting experienced Premiership cover for this position.

Our interest in Kenwyne Jones seems to have gone quiet due to Sunderland’s insistence that he will not be sold under any circumstances. Two schools of thought about this player, so if you are either Spurs or Sunderland I wouldn’t mind hearing your opinions on him. To be honest, I’ve not seen enough of the guy in action. And Match of the Day highlights when he does play well is not a good basis for making a true educated opinion on his value.


School of Thought #1 ‘He’s a Carlton Cole’

Not that Cole is a bad player to have at the minute (evident by his recent form for the Hammers). Cole’s got rid of the dj’ing and other distractions (and his knees seems to be ok nowadays) and also has the comfort of no competition at West Ham which has actually worked positively in his favour. So is Jones just a clone of Carlton? Jones is not prolific. He is not a natural goal-scorer and arguably has a poor touch and finishing ability compared to other Prem forwards (let alone players actually worth '£15M'). He’s also a bit lazy and apart from being a bit of a lump the only quality he does have is he’s good in the air.


School of Thought #2 ‘He’s a young Drogba’

I’m sure this has stuck from the time Roy Keane said he was the best forward in the country and he wouldn’t sell him for £20M. It was Keane who compared him to Drogba, and others also believe he will develop into the same type of player and that currently he is simply a young version of the Chelsea striker (without the diving). Simply needs to mature as a player before the class shines through. Can you see it? I can’t. Maybe I’m not looking hard enough.


The only question that should be asked (if this deal was to get back on track)? Is he what we need? I’d say what we need at the moment is a foil for Defoe. I don’t have faith in Bent and I think Pav would also probably benefit from a foilesque type of player.

Both JD and Pav are potentially 15-20 goals per season players, if partnered up well (whether that’s together is something Harry needs to work out). So, Jones – or whoever we look at as an alternative – is going to be our 3rd option. And that would have to be a bit of a lump with a touch of pace. Would also be a bonus if he had a good touch and finishing abilities.

Jones is big and can put himself about. And he has pace. And he also fits the Redknapp seal of approval. He’s the type of player he goes for. Obviously, considering we have enquired/bid for him. We also need someone who is strong in the air, and there’s no doubting this particular trait of Jones.

So is he the right forward to help complete the required trinity for survival and progression? Goals have dried up at the Lane since Berba and Keano moved on.

Regardless of whether he is closer to Cole than he is to Drogba (I still don't see it) or somewhere in the middle of the two.

Would you swap him for Bent? Would Sunderland be silly enough to take Bent?

With us being far from safe in our Prem League standing, does Jones fit the bill with the task at hand? If he doesn’t, who does?

You oaf Aaargh Cup

Well that was almost an unmitigated disaster. Thanks to the magic of Gilberto. Brazilian, in case you've forgotten. And a defender, allegedly. 6 games since joining about a year ago and he will be best remembered for being half-time substituted thanks largely due to his ridiculously bad impacts on the game.

One ball, two players, neither go for the ball, the Russian squeezes in and makes it a threesome, and oops, there it goes under Gomes body for 0-1. Total football. Totally laughable football, and this time you can hardly blame Gomes, although you'd think one of them would say 'ITS MINE'. In Brazilian you'd think.

The second goal (scored again by Dzjuba, a lively tricky little player) is worth mentioning for the way he ghosted pass Zokora to slot after rounding Gomes. 0-2. Goodbye Europe. But along comes half-time. Good old trustworthy half-time. And off goes Gilberto after his not so Braziliant cameo. And from Harry's post-match comments I doubt we'll ever see him again in a Spurs shirt. Maybe we can box him up and send him first class to Monaco. I'll pay the sodding postage if you want.

Second half was about 100% better, in our favour. Enter Lennon and his accompanying Mazy Run™ resulting with a cut-back and Modric (finally) scoring for Spurs. Dzjuba should have got a hattrick from a wonderful Zokora pass, but didn't. Enter Bale and a more than decent cross and a stunning Huddlestone header. 2-2. With NEC scoring a couple, this was a lucky escape, as defeat would have meant the end. We finished up second in the table and now face Shakhtar Donetsk, which is no easy task. And if we somehow manage to fluke past that we've got to contend with either CSKA Moscow or Aston Villa. Tasty. Shakhtar have six Brazilians in their squad. Maybe if we re-direct that package from Monaco to the Ukarine......

Anyway, lowest attendance of the season at the Lane for this wont-be-appearing-on-dvd Cup game. Shame on us. We'll be mistaken for Newcastle next. 28,000 or so in a 55,000 stadium (looking ahead) is Sunderlandesque. I guess to get the glory hunters on board we need to get into the Champions League. And the chances of that with this paper-thin squad is 0%.

Yet another caption competition

"Gomes prepared to catch anything to prove his worth"

Challenge Spurs™ - I really really love Sky Sports, I really do

We won. 1-0. Pav with another goal (that's 6 in 9 now). Great first half performance, but couldn't score that second which would have made it just a little bit less of a 'Oh God please no last minute equaliser' type of afternoon.

Second half, with Rovers down to 10 men was still fairly comfortable thanks to their inability to push forward and apply any type of pressure. Lennon, was in cracking form. Hasn't just put in pacey performances here and there this season, he's actually playing decently week in week out. Another reason to pat Harry Redknapp on the back.

Out of the bottom three, for the second time, and up to the giddy heights of 14th. Nosebleeds all round.

Now the match review is out of the way, let's get down to the business of ironic cheering and Sky Sports who pride themselves on hype and bullshit. See, a game of football is never enough for them. They have to take something and turn it into something else and do their best to make sure it builds a nice bit of momentum so that Sky Sports News have something to talk about every 30 minutes. Although (ironically) we have ourselves to blame for cheering in this manner in the first place, thus given them opportunity to run with it.

Spurs fans cheered with smiles on their faces every time Gomes got hold of the ball without a fumble or flap in sight. Now usually, ironic cheers like these are kept for the visit of David James. These type of cheers are blatantly tongue-in-cheek piss-takes. Because for all of James ability to drop a clanger, he can pull a mighty fine world-class save out of the bag. And we know it. Much like he knows it. There's no argument that these type of cheers are of an ironic nature. And YES, its not the cleverest thing for Spurs fans to do the same thing for their own keeper, because of the way it will be misconstrued.

However, to suggest Spurs fans this afternoon were cynical or negative to Gomes is mountain out of a mole hill ridiculous. That includes you Harry (who mentioned it in a post-match interview). Abusive language and booing is far worse than ironic cheering. And I'll prove it to you.

Back to the suggestion that this form of pisstaking is moral draining is it of the same level as the the Sky Sports Soccer Saturday panel do when they laugh and giggle and make jokes at Gomes expense? If Spurs fans 'hated' Gomes or did not want him in the side they would boo and shout abuse whenever he got the ball, not cheer or sing his name or applaud him - all things that Sky prefer not to mention because if they do, there's no story to be told.

People who publish photos on the back pages of the papers with clever and witty headlines, ridiculing a man for millions of people to read about is something I'd wager more likely to hit his confidence than a few hundred people cheering at a game.

Touched upon it a moment ago, but no mention of the same Spurs fans singing 'We love you Gomes, we do'. Why? Was this an editorial decision to make Spurs fans look bad? How about a news item on the constant booing the Arsenal home fans dish out to their own players. Or are they being ironic?

[ repeating myself ] Ironically cheering an opposition keeper for simple ball handling is what it is - a piss take. [ / repeating myself ]. When you do it to your own, its not the brightest of ideas even when meant in good-humour. But its far from being devastating. Much like Spurs fans singing 'England's Number One' to Robbo last year when he was complete shit. Surely that could be deemed ironic too? No? Robinson appreciated it, much like the positive applause he got from us today (he throw his gloves into the Spurs crowd......on purpose, they didn't slip off his hands).

For every Gomes fuck-up, he's made 3 or 4 great great saves. Doesn't excuse his fuck-ups, but one or two media hacks should concentrate on the facts rather than soap opera sub-plots. That includes Match of the Day 2 this evening.

Facts?

We sang his name.
He acknowledged us at the start of both the first and second halves of the game, during the game and after it when he APPLAUDED THE FANS.
The fans behind both goals stood up and applauded him.
He even managed a 'thank you' in our direction and was the last Spurs player off the field at the end of the game, having celebrated the three points with the home faithful.

This is Spurs AND Gomes sticking a middle finger up to the armchair pretty-boys and shaved-gorilla(s). I'd say its best next time to leave out the irony, but it was clear to anyone with their eyes and ears open that Gomes was just fine, got over his early mishap missing the ball completely and grow stronger in confidence as the game progressed.

So, fuck you Sky Sports.

And now back to Challenge Spurs™.

13 points in the bag now, halfway through the Dirty Dozen. Still part of the yo-yo that is 20th - 11th, and currently sitting in at 15th spot. Home win next weekend is once again imperative. But can't argue with our current form, even if we are still way way off playing at full capacity. And talk of Europe is still not acceptable.

Everton at the Lane next.

Challenge Spurs™ - The Kings of Calamity

Welcome back Paul Robinson. Cult figure at the Lane? First few season he was undeniably a crowd favourite. Long term contract, England's number one. Helping to gloss over his weakness were those shot-stopping television saves and a confident Spurs defence. Take away decent form from the team, and the cracks were suddenly more transparent. Do you drop a keeper who drops clangers every week to try and help him rebuild confidence with a gentle kick up the bum in the reserves or do you perceive until his form changes for the better? Robbo, from that air-kick in Croatia to countless conceded goals from distance, saw him go from a big smiling personality to a broken desperate caricature of what once was a certainty that he would be Spurs for a decade.

We never dropped him. His form got worse. And much like the loyalty players 'in-form' don't show to clubs like Spurs when they manoeuvre themselves to Old Trafford, we shifted him out of the club. The irony of replacing him with Gomes and then not dropping Gomes for his current form, is once more wonderfully ironic.

So, expect hilarity of world class proposition on Sunday afternoon, unless 'arry surprises us all with a selection that includes Alnwick or Cesar. King, Woodgate, Jenas and Bale should all be fit and ready for this. Did you shudder when I mentioned Bale?

After the poor showing at Craven Cottage, tomorrow has to be a carnival or electric football, one touch push and run. I'll take a 1-0 scrappy win at this point. Need maximium points from the next three games before we entertain Man Utd and welcome back Berbatov to the Lane.

It's one of those season where I don't think a team in our position (20th - 7th) will be free of the teams around us. Same for all of us in this grouping. You need to win maybe 5-6 games on the trot to start feeling confident of dropping points in successive games. Drop points in successive games at the minute, and you might just find yourselves rock bottom again.

Prediction: 3-1 Spurs.

Challenge Spurs™ - The Bale jinx must Go-mes

Challenge Spurs™ Series

Game 05 v (A) Fulham
2-1 Loss, 0 points
Total points: 12
Position: 19th
1 point from safety

I'm glad Harry Redknapp is still talking publicly about a 'relegation battle' as a reminder is needed for the players who decided to believe their own hype and take their eyes off the ball momentarily (figure of speech) to see us lose at Fulham. Yes, it was sort of expected that we would drop all 3 points there because traditionally that's exactly what happens, but I'm still disappointed that we didn't buck the trend a little. A draw and a few wins doesn't mean we are suddenly up and running because its fine giving it some against the likes of Arsenal and Liverpool, but its the bread and butter of the teams around us that need to be polished off with more intent and effort than Saturdays mediocre outing.



Bale played, we lost. Again. Poor lad needs to make an appearance when we are 3-0 up with 1 minute to go. Gomes, with yet another match-losing howler. Words escape me for the hilarity of the situation. A £9M legacy from the exceptional Comolli that will continue to haunt. Is Cesar not an option? This same scenario is reminiscent of the Paul Robinson saga which saw us keep the faith with him until no confidence or ability was left in him to do the basics right.

Drop him. Let him retain some kind of integrity as he re-builds his composure. Unless of course, what we see is what he does week in week out. Which in that case, let's just hope he doesn't cost us too many points before the Jan window re-opens. Arguably, on the flip side, he produced some amazing saves. Conundrum is our Gomes. As for Bale. Shocking again.

And the rest? Apart from maybe Modric (who left the field of play with an injury) the rest were average, making Fulham look far better than they actually are.

Onwards and upwards please.